For a while, I forgot about this account. A lot has happened, my love. School's back in session for Spring semester, and this time I actually have to work and study, to make sure I don't lose what little scholarship I have left. It's not easy. Nothing worth doing is.
I originally started this as some display of my love. I wanted to do something every day. At first, it was easy. I didn't have much in the realm of responsibility. But then I just forgot one day, and it snowballed. Now it's months later, and I feel rather guilty. I guess the best laid plans of mice and men, and all of that jazz.
And here we are now, in the first month of 2011. You've got exams, I've got a new semester, the usual. Life goes on. Maybe I came back here because I know that you're incredibly stressed.
The rents say I've done a lot of growing up. That I'm doing a lot of growing up. I don't really know if it's true, but I'm rather conflicted if it is. I guess I miss being without responsibility, but who doesn't? Don't mind me, I'm rambling.
I'm trying this new thing where I don't worry. It's hard, and maybe that's why my head is pounding. Even now, our conversation dwindles. I want so badly for you to ask to hear my voice, but I keep my wishes in my heart, and in this entry. Chances are, you don't remember this place, seeing as I forgot about it.
Who am I kidding. I never forgot it. It was always in the back of my mind, and I kept pushing it off. I'm glad I'm getting around to it now. I missed typing this up. More than that, I miss you. That's why I want to hear and see you, you know? Because I miss you, and that's the closest I can get right now. You have no idea how badly I wish to be by your side. How I miss everything about you.
I'd give anything for teleportation. I'd give anything for any way to see you, even if I was given Jesusboots and was told to walk across the damn ocean. But that won't happen. We'll both keep going to classes, and the ocean will be as unwalkable as ever.
Someday, my love. Someday.
I love you.